On the couch

The things we do on a Thursday night >>>

leaving the office feeling somewhat lost
with my gym bag swinging dejectedly beside me
knowing its not going to be of much use tonight.. '

I headed towards my friendly neighborhood grocery store
where the wonders of produce
belies hours of gastronomic pleasure

That was how I came to be
With a Sandman in one hand
A Shiraz and feta cheese soaked in olive oil on the other
passing an unremarkable but very full-bodied night
.... and that is just the overture

Now a bitter chocolate to accompany the 2nd
or maybe 3rd or 4th glass of red..
it has tapered to a sweet, lilting end note

Dark claret on dark mahogany
contrast and compliment
a sensory symphony

I savored each silver of rich decadence
with a fully satisfied lick of the lips



Pondering the endless complex reflections that Sandman besots
and watching Gremlins with my dad

Somehow the weight of loss and regret
is always not far from the mind

I am not a happy person
I try to be the best person I can be
but thats about it

For now, a wine a couch and a book ..will do
Waiting for that piece that fit just right

A fitting sign-off
~ The hardest thing I've done, is keep beliving..
that theres someone in this crazy world for me




j

:: My Song :: for now

It would seem like I have come full circle
and this song has become even more fitting then ever
To how I feel tonight ..

When words fail you
there are always other people out there
better able to articulate it then you ...

So lets hear it for Karen's favorite Carpenters song..
and now mine too >>

The hardest thing I've ever done is keep believing
There's someone in this crazy world for me

The way that people come and go through temporary lives
My chance could come and I might never know

I used to say "no promises, let's keep it simple"
But freedom only helps you say Good-bye

It took a while for me to learn
That nothing' comes for free
The price I've paid is high enough for me

(*) I know I need to be in love
I know I've wasted too much time
I know I ask perfection of a quite imperfect world
And fool enough to think that's what I'll find

So here I am with pockets full of good intentions
But none of them will comfort me tonight

I'm wide awake at four a.m.
Without a friend in sight
Hanging on a hope but I'm alright


~ by Richard Carpenter & John Bettis & Albert Hammond
------------------------------------------------------

You kinda know the state you have fallen into
When you start relating your life to a pop song...


But I still think that the lyrics are beautiful and melancholic

And the song plays in my head for now
like a siren..
drawing me to crash and burn
upon the rocky coasts of reality



<3 j

:: quote of the day::

As it had laid on my coffee table everyday
staring at me with the soulful eyes
of a cockel spaniel in an SPCA advertisement..


I had finally relented
and picked it up for a read
while ignoring other jealous little literary daggers
radiating from my bookshelf


But it has proven to be a wonderful companion
on my ride home
embarrassing me in front many innocent paserbys
while i snickered uncontrollably into the book





The Wit and Wisdom of Discworld
As as usual Terry Pratchett doesn't fail to deliver
Like a condensed version of every punchline made by the Master
It brings you down the memory lane of every book you have read
and remind you why he is undeniably--- unbeatable


To extract my favorite quotes from there is pretty futile
Considering that I will probably end up posting the entire book
which will probably make me a criminal for plagerism
not to mention the monster callouses
that will afflict my poor fingers


And why should I pay $40 bucks for that book
while you cheapskates read it from the web ;p
so buy your own book ..lol


Nonetheless
It is a MONDAY and everybody deserves some cheering up ..
So here is a tasty morsel to tempt the taste buds
like the licking of whipped cream off a frappe


" In the bathtub of history the truth is harder to hold than soap, and much more difficult to find..."


"The shape of DNA, it is popularly said, owes its discovery to the chance sight of a spiral staircase when the scientist's mind was just at th right receptive temperature. Had he used the lift, the whole science of genetics might have been a good deal different. *

* Although, possibly, quicker. And only licensed to carry fourteen people."


And now with my nightly meditations on the keyboard done..
I shall proceed to enjoy the book till I fall asleep
dampening the book ever so slightly with my enthusiastic drool ..


lights out

:: My french love affair ::

An unassuming dirt path
That seemingly leads to nowhere


Walk along it and you will find...
a gateway into another world
one which opens your mind to new experiences
of joy, laughter, amazement and the bittersweet


Alliances Françaises is one of those relatively undiscovered gems in Singapore
and recently I am rediscovering it ...
enjoying their movie screenings every Tuesday
The eclectic array of movie offerings are a wonder to explore
Straying far from the usual sameness of Hollywood.
And at $7.20 a movie
I think its the most value-for-money education one can find


Now I eagerly check Sistic for the next movie,
the next adventure, the next new experience
But it is a journey that I rather not embark upon alone
Part of the fun is in discussing the movie afterwards
And learning more along the way...


Luckily I was able to marshal some troops last week
for the screening of Perseoplis..





::wikipedia's plot summary::
An animated film based on Marjane Satrapi's autobiographical graphic novel of the same name. The story follows a young girl as she comes of age against the backdrop of the Iranian Revolution, which goes horribly wrong with Islamic fundamentalists taking power and creating a new theocratic tyranny themselves; the story ends with Marjane as a 21-year-old expatriate.


The title is a reference to the historic city of Persepolis.
The film won the Jury Prize at the 2007 Cannes Film Festival


While some people might wonder ...
>> How can such a serious issue be addressed in animation?


I felt that they have managed to utilize the freedom
and artistic representations in animation...
done mostly in black and white,
with choice splashes of colour..
to tell the story simply and eloquently.


In a very refreshing way,
with sensitivity, candidness and
peppered with the occasional black humor.


There were times where the whole theater laughed out loud together
emphatising with the protagonist
feeling and seeing the story through her eyes


I left feeling more connected to the history of Iran and its people
However with more knowledge
..we are able to see the ugliness of mankind and the world with greater clarity
Which can weight down as a burden for the heart..


However, despite leaving with a slightly heavy heart
I felt my mind more open, more seeing, more free
With new knowledge, comes liberation from the fence
that ignorance builds around us


And to be able to soar above the mundane and microscopic view
of my life and my everyday world..


>> It is a definite worthy price to pay..


So a toast to Alliances Françaises
and its dedication in sharing such treasures with the rest of us.

:: my journey towards film nirvana::

An ode to a friend..


He has decided to pass down his infinite wisdom of film appreciation
and given me a list of must-watch movies that
I...the slack pupil
... had shunned without knowing their true magic


So to honor my Shi Fu Movie Connoisseur,
Let me present my :: Movie Hit List ::


1. Pulp Fiction
2. The History of Violence
3. Fight Club
4. American History X
5. The Secret
6. Eastern Promises
7. American Beauty
8. Prestige
9. Bladerunner
10. Night Watch
11. Day Watch
12. Crash
13. 3:10 to Uma
14. Flags of our father
15. Into the Wild
16. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind


3 more than the 13 books I will have to read.
While there will be no balancing on beams by the seaside
nor waxing of cars with 2 hands


I will aim to be at the top of my game on this
And not let my shi fu down..
I will be .. The Couch Potato Kid!!
*ahem*
sound track please...
ta ta ta ....
ta ta ta ...

Book Hit List ~ death by reading

A link to the "All time 100 books" by Time Magazine
and a question of "how many have you read?"
was posted to me just last week..


That piqued my interest
and I went about the challenge..scrolling and counting


And I am not ashamed to admit..
My amazingly pitiful head count was >>
3 novels read from cover to cover
3 more..started but not finished...
And many many more that I have always wanted to read
but never got around to


While I do not agree with ALL of the author's picks
(Zadie Smith = *yawns*)
And I wish some others were inside
(Come on ..wheres Pride and Prejudice? )


At the end of the day ..
Its all personal


I might just happen to have crappy taste for books
yes..
me ..
the one who shys away from anything that even smells of
feel-good and romance


who could tell right ;p


But bare with me here..
As the list did inspire me to adapt a shorter list
of the books that I must read in the next couple of years
Well.. Preferably before I die ..


So here it goes:


My own Book Hit List >>


1. Brideshead Revisited~ Evelyn Waugh
2. A Death in the Family~ James Agee
3. Animal Farm~ George Orwell
4. Light in August~ William Faulkner
5. Lord of the Flies~ William Golding
6. Catch- 22 ~ Joseph Heller
7. A Clockwork Orange~ Anthony Burgess
8. Mrs. Dalloway~ Virginia Woolf
9. The Grapes of Wrath~ John Steinback
10. I, Claudius~ Robert Graves
11. Watchmen~ Alan Moore & Dave Gibbons
12. 1984~ George Orwell
13. War and Peace~ Leo Tolstoy


Yeap my lucky no. 13..
And I shall go about attacking these books with the same vengeance
Uma Thurman goes about ticking names off her list in Kill Bill
*eee hah!*


While these books will probably be read in between
other equally interesting books that catch my fancy
I hope to at least tick off at least 4 in a year
Hmm.. which will make that a 3-year hit job ;p


And I hope to read more "classics" in time ..
Despite the fact that our education system does not support
the active appreciation of classics


I think it is still important for us to strike a balance
in understanding what drove the literary world in the past
and what is is relevant to us in the future..


One will never be poorer for reading more..


And if this has intrigued you as much as it did to me


Here is the link>>

http://www.time.com/time/2005/100books/the_complete_list.html

Art of War and Relaxation

If Sun Tze ever swam in a public swimming pool
He would have dedicated part of his all-famous war strategies to it


I know that swimming is suppose to calm you
But anybody who has ever swam in a public swimming pool..
ON A WEEKEND
Will know that it is more like a mad-cap Super Mario game


The journey from one end of the pool to another
is filled with numurous obstacles and sudden ambushes
that it will make entering Mango on a 70% sale
or finding dancing space in Puture at Zouk on a saturday night
seem like a delightful stroll in the park ...


Ever tried minding your own business and keeping to you own lane?
One that you have so carefully chosen to avoid any other swimmers.
Far away from the screaming kiddies in PJs, and googles>>
Like over-enthusiastic alien tadpoles learning to swim


But somehow..
once you start swimming..
you feel like a super hero .
not in a good way ...


In the way that >>
It seems like all forces of evil are plotting to get you


With the first stroke..
Rouge kiddes appear, straying into your lane..
And while you are being distracted by them
some guy JUST happen to want to swim in the exact same lane as you
Despite the many other elatively free lanes available.


As you re-enter the water after gasping for breath
you see that dude tunneling towards you ..
not caring what is in his way.. not seeing either

And there are the occasional "floaters"
older folks.. who stubbornly swim the breath of the pool at their own leisure
making everybody who are swimming the length stop to let them pass


THEN there are the "road blocks"
who hang around the end of the pool
suntanning, chatting... or trying their best to look cool
basically not doing any swimming at all

In the end ..everything boils down to a game of chicken
If you see someone in your path of motion
just keep on swimming forward
the loser will be the one who shifts their course just in time
to avoid a deadly aquatic collision


While I do not exactly have a death wish
But every time I enter a public swimming pool
I become this aggressive lioness
possessively protecting my territory
Ready to dish out a "friendly" kick (not hard of course)
in the direction of anyone who dare to veer too close into my lane


And this, I have to shamefully admit ..
is not me at my civic minded best.. ;p


But I SWEAR .. I never laid a hand (or feet in this case)
on the kiddies


As much as I would have liked to stuff their blindingly fluorescent swimming caps
into their mouths to stop them from breaking the sound barrier with their shreking


While I'm sure all these said will make me sound like a vicious mean old biddy
And I should just go get a private pool *like duh*
But till that happens
I will keep my gripes


However .. I did enjoy my swim today
The feel of my body weightlessly cutting through the water
In an water-logged choreographic ballet
feeling every muscle straining with every stroke
and the fragmented sunlight entering the water and caressing my skin


With that I shall end with a promotion of ::Jaslyn's Spa::


Feeling in need of some TLC,
I decided to pamper myself with my very own home-spa session
Having bought a "love me" package from Bodyshop
I set about exfoliating and moisturizing..
~ the whole shebang


After an evening of....
papaya body scrub
strawberry body moisturizer
grape seed cuticle oil
tea bag eye mask
seaweed face mask
and oilve oil hair mask


I felt ..and smelt like an exotic fruit salad..
yummmy ..


NOW for a limited time only ..
There is a one for one promotion at Jaslyn's home spa
>> Bring a bottle of wine
and you get 1 free spa session..


AND if you bring cheese along as well
you will get a free massage ..


lol
hows that for a sweet deal..

:: Strange Invitation ::

The sky was turning a purplish hue
from grey to violet to dark indigo blue


slight, a gentle breeze tug at my hair
playfully blowing them into my face


the stars were making their stellar appearances
with a hint of the bashful moon


what a wonderful night for a run...


And ran i did>>
Up the endless stairs of fort canning
through its leafy refuge


my lungs fueled by the cool night air
heady with tropical scents


Accompanied by the street lamps
I see furtive couples huddled under the cover of shadows
and a lone jogger or 2 panting by


I startled a cat patiently stalking a prey
way out of my sight


But from its stilled hunched body
With tension in every muscle
I could almost see a pounce waiting to take flight



My passing only warranted a cursory glance from Mr Cat
Not worthy of its interest


Just like we would not pause our lives
to see a fly buzz by


Feeling rather slighted
I continued on my running route


Crossing bridges and fields
and past the brightly lit esplanade
all decked and pimped out ..
ready for a big show on August, the 9th..


Rehearsals was on going full steam ahead
and as a monstrous ferris wheel rose gaily before me..
Neon green, pink and blue lighting up the now darkening sky
like a giant circular Christmas tree..


I heard strands of our national day song


Despite being allergic to patriotism
and any other -isms that require my whole-hearted belief
that the actions of a few men are for the greater good of me


Still...
I felt the hairs on the back of my neck stand
not literally that is..
but close enough..


Its amazing how
underneath that veneer of skepticism
and general disillusionment of the society as a whole
this jaded little heart
can still be touched by some cheesy song about home


You go Kit Chan ..


And as I was fell into an easy rhythm
the background buzz of traffic lulling me
into a state of mind-out-of-body

Inevitably ...
I though of a strange invitation I had received today >>
"Do you want to join SDU?"

Well the answer was a firm and immediate
"Thanks but no thanks"

Not that I see it as a social stigma
it is just that ..


Kinda like the difference between


Wanting to buy a dress..


>>Rummaging through a lot of shops and getting distracted along the way ..
buying everything but the dress
trying a lot of dresses that you think might fit
only to be disappointed in the dressing room countless times..
and then finally
when you least expect it
you come across that perfect dress
*at the right price of course...


>>Versus..
having a professional shopper bring you a set of dresses
what she thinks might fit you
and you just pick the best one you like from there
and all is done with a snap of the fingers


Well...
I enjoy buying my dresses the old fashion way


Granted there are too many busy people out there
Caught up with their life and work
that they have to pay other people
to help them filter through a whole lot of people
and telling them who they should get to know better


*shrugs*
there is no accounting for logic


Now that we have ready-packaged spouses
and ready packaged weddings
what next ?


Ready packaged kids?
I should start a business
selling people the opportunity to grow the kids that they want


Consider this
Mom and Pop >> too busy with their own lives
to bother with the hassle of the trail and error method of raising kids


I can offer a package that allows them to >>
Choose the genes of their child-to-be,
How he/she is to look like,
What schools they should attend to
What skills they must learn..
Which type of friends they should hang out with


And wala!
Kids grown the way you want them..
Before you know it, they have become adults
to be just the way you expect them to be
..and can be proud of..


Tada !


Well .. perhaps in the future


Which seems so wrong


I shudder at the thought of what the world will be coming to


Well..
that short mental exercise all happened in the nice hour long run
which gave both my legs and my mind a good stretch


But the nagging question had taken root
deep in the crevices of my cerebral nodes


>>> Will I join SDU ..??
>> Even 10 years down the road.. and sitting on the shelf ??


hmm.. .




nahhhhhhh ...



I want to find that perfect dress myself..
Even if it means rummaging though flea markets and the likes
You never know where you just might find the perfect one
that fits you just right ..





<3